Nine Months In

It was 9 months ago, that I said those wonderful words of "I do" to my wonderful husband. I didn't think it was wonderful at first. Baylor lost his job, then we experienced financial hardship. We lived with his parents for a couple of months then moved in with my parents. God brought trial after difficult trial in our lives, but He later revealed his purpose in refining us. That sometimes God brings you through difficult times to show that He can overcome them. And He did. Baylor was hired by a Company called KoneCranes, one of the top 10 best international companies to work for in the world. This job not only provide great pay, but amazing employee benefits. He has been an employee now for 6 months and already his supervisors are looking to promote him. God is good. Three months ago we moved in an apartment in West Mobile. It is a One bedroom one bath. Perfect for our first place. There have been many times where we weren´t sure if we would have money for food, money for rent, but every single time God has provided over and above.

Things to meditate on if your are getting married or are already married. " Love is patient, Love is KIND, It does not ENVY, it does not BOAST, it is not PROUD.It is not RUDE or SELF -SEEKING, it is not easily ANGERED, it keeps no records of WRONGS. Love does not delight in evil but REJOICES in TRUTH. IT always PROTECTS, ALWAYS TRUSTS, ALWAYS PERSEVERES. LOVE NEVER FAILS. 1 Cor. 13:4-8

When we become angry or annoyed at our loved ones think and meditate on these things. Good night and God bless

Drowning

I cant say anything with you getting upset. I cant have a opinion. Im dying. Even if I try to be what I want you to be, Even that I cant be enough. Im tired. Im scared. I feel trapped even.I cannot trust you fully and you have already made up you mind not to trust me. Every time we hang out we fight. WE have to fight every time we hangout ! I hate it. Im sick. I'm sad. Im depressed. I want relief. I want a way out. I want peace. There can be no peace, just separate lives. Just lives being fake with each other on a daily basis. I'll be what you think you want not what you need. Im depressed. Im lonely. Im dying inside. Unhappy with everything. Im dying inside. Do you not see me? DO you not see my pain? My frustration? My agony? Where can I go? No where? Where can I hide? No where? I can not run! You will taunt me. When Im scared, you tell me I'm weak. When I'm crying on the floor you make me feel worthless. I am nothing, a shadow. Help me, before I am destroyed emotionally.

Need to Breathe

Sometimes I feel the need to express my feelings, but I get in trouble. Sometimes I want to give up. Sometimes I want to delete. Sometimes I want to getaway. Sometimes I wonder if God sees me. If he sees my anguish, my frustration, and my sadness. Sometimes I feel like the only one I can rely on is the Lord. No one else is dependable, not my parents, not my friends, not even my sweet husband. I'm in it alone.Just the Lord and me. Why is life so complicated? Why do feelings get hurt over trivial things? Why do people hate so much? I'm tired and worn down from all the emotion. I can't share my inner most thoughts without being patronized for it. I look forward to the day when Jesus will make all things new.

A piece of my heart: In the tough times

My Husband lost his job a month before our wedding. He has been applying for jobs non-stop and the unemployment office is giving us the run around. He recently came across a website called the Auction Employment training institute where you can sale other peoples stuff and make a profit. After he used my debit card to sign up for this training program, I researched to find it was a scam. I was a little upset that I was so naive to the situation. This lesson has taught me to research about business or company before investing in it. There are all kinds of people out there waiting to scam young naive people. I do know one thing though! God will never scam us. He is a sure investment. One can trust that He will take care of all their needs and he will give over and above what we need.

2 Peter 1:3 " His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness."

Ephesians 3:20 " Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us."

Even though times can be tough, we have a big and Mighty God to Trust in and take care of us!